Tag Archives: Work

An end to an era

Sucking at something is the first step to becoming sorta good at something

Jake, Adventure Time

From the recent updates at work, apparently, I suck very much. What better way to motivate someone who is already in doubt about staying or not. The worst part is, that it is not even related to my work. It is related to what others think and say about me. I cannot even fight back, and defend myself because of the “he said, she said” thing. No real proof, no real facts, just hearsay. 

The others is a general term, used by our manager for feedback sessions. It is a term she loves (among many other derogative terms she keeps for agents that do not met her standards). It gives her power by dividing us, by making us mistrust one another. 

So, I come back to the conclusion that it is not the work and its quality, but how much one can suck up to the boss. 

That is where I really suck.

I cried over it. 

Like a complete and utter dumbass, I cried.

I guess it is my mistake as well. I got comfortable knowing that I have a job. The fear of not having a job, and having a hard time getting one, two years ago, has stuck with me. I dread going over that whole process of interviews and waiting.

The best part of all of this was Johnny’s reaction. He almost chocked with his coffee, while laughing at me.

Yep, he laughed. 

He was not the only one that laughed. 

That hurt even more. 

Here I am crying myself out, trying to figure out why and how this happened, and people are just laughing at the absurdity of it all. I really am a dumbass. 

So, without further rambling and ranting, I have prepared my resignation. Tomorrow, when we have our team meeting (of course it had to be on my day off), I will submit it. 

If this is considered giving up, then I give up. There is no point in going on like this. I would rather dread two, three months of job hunting than another year working in that environment. It will not be like before. The fact that I will resign my job tomorrow doesn’t mean that I will leave straight away. I will still have 45 days to enjoy their lovely company. But, that’s a good thing. It gives me two months (while I am being paid) to find another job. 

All I have to do is to survive tomorrow. That is the most important thing.

A bit of luck?

I got the call that I was waiting hoping for. I know that I shouldn’t get my hopes up. I’ve done this in the past, in similar situations, and was disappointed with the results.

I really want this to happen. Monday will be the first step towards a new possible beginning.

Until I know for sure that it will happen, I cannot move a single muscle. I cannot let others know about it either. To put it bluntly, things are not going so well at work. I guess it is frustration that has been pilling up. I want so bad to rant about it. To get it out of my system, but that will not change things nor will it make me feel any better.

The thought of working during the holidays again, doesn’t warm me either.

Being in a position of leadership, doesn’t make things easier. If things go well and if I were to quit my job, I would still be stuck there for another 45 working days. That is almost 2 months and it is not a good thing. I will need to use diplomacy in order to get out early, with both parts agreeing to it. Considering I am not the only one that wants to quit (2 people already submitted their resignation), it will be very hard to come to an agreement with them.

The understaffed part and the inability of the management to get new people, will make it hard for anyone who wants to leave. They will try to keep us for as long as possible. Maybe with a bit of luck, things will go my way.

Did I mention that I want this really bad? You could say that I’ve become desperate for a way out. Unfortunately, I cannot quit without knowing for sure that a new job is secured. Until I sign the new contract, I will be patient and do my job (even if that will kill me inside).

Is this how British summers are?

July is almost over and it’s still cold and it rains almost every day, and night I might add.

rainy days

It’s quite depressing.

Now, I do not like the summers when it’s so hot that you sweat even when doing nothing. It’s just that I was expecting more sunshine and less rain.

Not only that, but it feels like time has stopped, especially if I am at work. You know, at first I was reluctant and thought that it might not be the best idea to quit. Well, I’ve changed my mind. I am glad I’ve quit and hopefully I will not have any permanent damage from this job.

Oh well, 25 days to go. Yes, I am counting each day till freedom!

Till then, I hope I will finish my second needlepoint project, that I will lose some of my belly and that I will learn a new recipe.

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Regarding the belly fat, Johnny bought this new thing (I’m guessing it’s called a juicer in English) we now keep in the kitchen. It can make fresh juice out of almost anything. We now have a fridge full with apples and carrots, and I’m planing on buying other fruits as well. One glass a day of fresh juice really helps me not to binge on ice cream or other stuff.

Not only that, but I’ve cooked a new type of pasta this week. It was pasta with tuna! I know Johnny doesn’t like fish so I made it mostly for myself and it was so good and easy to make!

We’ve kinda splurged this month now that I think about it. We bought new phones, the juicer but we’ve paid all the bills as well and we haven’t starved yet. So, that’s a good thing.

While Johnny got an iPhone 5, I got an AllView X2 Soul. He likes the Apple operating system, while I like the Android since I find it easier to use (I still have traumas after trying to put music on my iPod using iTunes). Not only that, but I bought my phone for pictures, storage and the fact it moves so smooth and nice. Johnny bought the iPhone for reasons I am not yet aware.

Well, I cannot complain about Johnny’s iPhone, after all I got the headphones. And, the headphones are not cheap if you try to buy them from the store.

It’s official!

I don’t even know how to start this post. I think I should be happy, but I can’t seem to feel a little uneasy as well. It might be from the weather (we’re in June and it’s still cold and gloomy) or from being tired (I work on the night shift now).

I just quit my job. I have one more month at work (last day of work is on the 22nd of July). I did promise myself that I will not work longer than 2 years in customer service, and I should be proud for keeping that promise. But, I will miss my co-workers/friends and it feels I will not find people like them anywhere else.

It’s funny because at the first job I had, I loved what I was doing by not the people that I’ve worked with. And now, I love the people I work with but I hate the job. I should make a new promise to myself to not lose touch with my friends.

And there’s more..

We (me and Johnny) are officially living alone. Yup, just the two of us and Marlanu’.

I can honestly say I haven’t had a cooked meal in almost 2 weeks. That’s my only complaint. Not only that I don’t have time (because of the night shift), but I never actually cooked meal that involved more than potatoes and meat. So, at the moment I’m on Google looking for easy and quick recipes, like chicken soup. I also have to find recipes that Johnny would eat. After all, he’s a fussy eater while I could eat anything.

There is also the cleaning (which I love!), shopping (groceries and things needed in the house), making sure all is paid on time and the usual stuff that involves keeping up an household.

I think this is a milestone for me.

~~~~ An update on the chicken soup ~~~~

chicken soup

It’s done! It tastes good. I have FOOD!!!

Working in customer service

Sometimes I miss my old office with my personal computer, where I could play the music I like and just do things at my own pace.
But the thing I miss most is the fact I didn’t work with people.

Old pic of my deskAfter a year and a half working in customer service I’ve realized that it doesn’t matter what country you live in, what language you speak or what color your skin is. A**holes are everywhere!

Sometimes when I’m on the phone I don’t know if I should laugh or cry. It’s mindblowing to see how horrible some people would treat you for the slightest inconveniences.
Working with people is not for everyone. You don’t need people skills. You need nerves of steel and the ability to brush things off. I’ve seen bright people change in a matter of weeks. Yet the people who are the most insensitive and fake have no problem handling 8 hours a day, 5 days a week working in customer service.

But there’s a bright side as well. Yes, there is such a thing in customer service! I love my colleagues that try to make my day better. I love the people that call and just share a laugh with you, treat you nice or are patient when it takes a bit longer. I’ve also learned how to handle stressful situations, to be patient with people and just take things as they are without stressing over them.

I do believe this will help me later in life.  I’ve come a long way from my anti-social days locked up in a tiny office.

The only reason I am still working in customer service is the need to finish university. If it weren’t for that stupid diploma (which is just a piece of paper that companies ask for as a formality), I wouldn’t have picked this job. I still need to survive 5-6 months and then I will be free. I will be free to pick a different type of job. I know there is no such thing as a perfect job, but I will go for something less stressful and better paid.

Baby steps

Went to work today. I hated it! I had a hard time to find the will to get out of bed and just get ready for work. It’s not the morning shift, it’s not the people, it’s the job itself. It’s depressing and unrewarding.

Yet, I found a good spot and kept it throughout the day. Did my own thing and just pushed forward.

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Positive thoughts, taking action and baby steps towards my happy place. I shall soon find it, and I know I won’t be disappointed. Writing random thoughts on a notebook at the end of the day helps a lot.

Tomorrow I shall do something. I don’t know what, but I will do it. Just for the heck of it.

Here I am..

Every year around the same time the Internet goes crazy. The finals are coming and low and behold so many people put off their projects and don’t study till the last minute.

I don’t know how, but my finals are in late January – early February. I didn’t start working on them till today.

I’m not actually afraid of the normal exams, I am worried about the exam and the fact that I won’t be able to get into it because of unfinished business from previous years. I have one project from last year that I didn’t turn in and one math exam that I failed in my first year. So, in January I’ll have to re-take them and hope for the best.

In fact, work is the only thing that keeps me awake. The ever changing shifts, the stress of dealing with people 8 hours each day (some nice, others not so nice) and the lack of a proper vacation has gotten to me.

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I can’t wait for the X-mas holidays. Until then I will work slowly but surely on my projects.

Work doodles

It is cold again. No more sunshine and no more spring like weather. It’s time for winter to take its place, after all it is November. Somehow that doesn’t depress me.

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I am hoping that I will take my drivers license before the snow comes and for that I need to study for the exam. It’s not going to be fun at all.

Other than that, what can I say. Nothing new, same old things. I’m just more tired than usual and I’m guessing my brain needs a break. Especially from work, but that’s not going to happen any time soon. I can only say that I am happy towards the persons that invented the pen and paper.

Doodles are a  lifesaver for me.

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I might not be the greatest artist in the world, but somehow I feel proud after I finish one of these. It’s like my inner child is giddy with joy that I can still draw something. I still regret not keeping up with drawing like I used to, but that’s life. You can’t do everything, and I am focusing on studying … besides doodles, there are the eternal hiragan characters that I still can’t remember.

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I will get there, I won’t give up. After all I have all my life ahead to learn this language.